A wonder, no wonder: To the greatest lady warrior

A wonder, no wonder

Monday, March 09, 2009

To the greatest lady warrior

I know I've not been perfect half the time. Rather, I know I've not been perfect most of the time. I sit here with fuzzy memories of our past, yet, I'm haunted with the images from our present.

To the greatest lady warrior I've ever known: I love you. You'll always be in my heart even though you've gone. 4 years you've kept going, yet, 4 years too long, I feel. Each day to think that you're suffering is painful. Although I miss the memories, although I'm haunted by the fact that there will be no more memories to come, I'm happy. I'm happy that after 4 years of suffering, that you're now in a much better place.

I remember the times when we used to make curry puffs together. I remember the time you cooked salty food. I remember the times when I used to grumble at you when you hijacked the television. However, I remember the best that I never visited you when you suffered a stroke. The last time I saw you was 2 hours ago. When you lay in that spotless, white place. You looked as beautiful as you were years ago. 4 years I've neglected to see you because I was a coward. Afriad to break my own heart to see you like that. My last prayer for you is that you please, please forgive me. I've always loved you and will never forget. How I wish I could taste your salty cooking one last time. How I wish I could grumble at you one last time.

To the greatest lady warrior I've known: Thank you for being such a warrior. Through the japanese occupation, through recent times, through the times you always told me to listen to my father when I was a little fucking brat.

Secretly it still aches inside me. The guilt and the regret I'll live with. My last tribute to the warrior that was my grandmother. A hell of a lady. A hell of a warrior. I love you. Always.

Rest in peace Mama, 07 March 2008.

posted by The Als @ 2:11 am

2 Comments:

At 10:43 pm, Ying said…

Aww Alson..you made me tear.. :'(
At 7:10 pm, Mark Soo said…

Be strong bro.
Cherish those close to you now :)